It is an understatement to say Valentines Day is the worst holiday ever. If you're single... do i even have to say it? If you're attached, it's a pain in the ass. The sentence "When you're in love, every day is a Valentines Day" is the BEST thing i've ever heard.
I can come up with a long list of why i hate Valentines Day. Not now though. Here, are my ideas on how to spend Valentines Day. Best of all, you can do it with a bunch of friends (which i think is more fun, the more the merrier!) No more boring restaurants, spas, flowers, hotels, shopping malls, touristy spots, crowded places, boring activities. Instead, have a really unique, special, different, unconventional, fun, unusual and awesome Valentines :D
1. Picnic at any Singapore island not called "Sentosa".
Prepare picnic food, or if you're a guy, any filling food that taste edible even cold, and get your ass to an island. Have a picnic there. Enjoy the beach, do bollywood dances around trees, and if you're dodgy, fornicate in a secluded spot. Either way, ferry rides are always fun. (Unless you fall into the sea, then it's goodbye.)
Islands recommended: Palau Ubin, St Johns Island and Kusu Island.
2. Lim Chu Kang Nature and Ghostly Trail.
Visit the farms situated along Neo Tiew Road, take a stroll in the middle of nowhere surrounded by only things green, have a fruit juice, eat some flowers (literally, if you can find the restaurant that serves them), do some bird see-ing (unless you prefer the other kind) and end the night with a tour of the Lim Chu Kang cemetery. Win-win situation if you're a guy, unless you're more frightened of otherworldly stuff.
Places recommended: Bollywood Veggies, Fruit/Flower farms, Goat farm, Sungei Buloh Nature Reserve, Kranji Dam (great at night), Lim Chu Kang Cemetery. Or you can check out the Christian cemetery nearby which has gorgeous tombstones, statues of various kinds and interesting inscriptions.
3. Visit the Science Centre.
Ah, brings back memories of school days doesn't it? Of hand-holding, walking in pairs, don't get lost, listen to teacher trips. Surprisingly, it's still a fun place to visit even as an adult. Go see good old Albert Einstein climbing up and down a pole, press your face against the incubator glass hoping to see chicks hatch from eggs (has anyone actually seen one hatch before?) and go gaga over the amazing stuff at the Science Centre shop.
Why it's good - It's cheap, hopefully crowded with kids (pray they're not shriekers or wailers) and not sick lovey dovey couples holding silly floral bouquets. Eat at Macdonalds - buy a kid's meal just for kicks (cheap too, plus get free toy, good deal!) And for the final romantic/fun touch, buy a space ice cream to share! You know, ice cream that spacemen eat?
4. Chill in Changi, watch hotties.
If you stay in the West like i do, aside from FML, there's nothing more you can say. Then again, going to the East from the West is almost like going for a mini holiday, right? Take the train down to Changi Airport, shop there, eat breakfast there, enjoy the aircon, enjoy first-class toilets, oogle at gorgeous flight crew (subtly) and take the skytrain 10 times. Then head over to Changi Chapel Museum steep yourself in history, as well as some mourning time at the lovely chapel. Proceed to Changi Village to browse fishing equipment shops, eat again, chill at one of the pubs, play with cats and if the gf/bf is ok with it, round it off with the famous tour of Changi carpark where you can see gorgeous trannies (awesome-ness depends on the time you go, midnight to 1am is the best). Spend the remaining of the night under the stars at Changi beach.
Oh yeah - There's a little 2nd hand shop at Changi Village, alongside fishing equipment shops, right next to the hawker centre. Go there, set a budget as a challenge and buy a present for each other. Say, $5 to buy something and the other party has to wear it for the rest of the night.
5. Go Old School.
One of my favourite place in Singapore is the Salvation Army Family Store along Aljunied Road. It's filled with every thing you can think of. Clothes, furniture, books, knick knacks - and if you have a sharp eye, you may find really old-school, retro stuff. Not only are there many things to keep you occupied, you're also donating to charity when you purchase something :D After Salv, head on to Old Sungei Road next to Sim Lim and take a walk through the thieves' market. Amidst all the old uncles and aunties selling all sorts of things at the open air carpark, you can buy stuff like old clocks, manual cameras, vintage specs to aged photographs. End the day with a quick dinner in an air-conditioned place then head home and snuggle up with an old film, and your loved one, of course.
Take note: Salvation closes early on Sat (either noon or six, can't remember) and is closed on Sun. Thieves market starts around 3pm and ends when sun sets. Be friendly! The Salv people are very nice and chatty. Talk to the old sungei road aunties and uncles! They all have interesting stories to share. Have fun bargaining, but don't be too petty. Don't be a bastard and argue over $8 trying to make it $4. It'There's a difference between needing the money and being able to spare the money.
6. Dogs, Fishes, Prawns.
Head to Pasir Ris farmway. There's tons dogs to see at several dog kennels/shops. Casually start the topic of "If one day you start a family, what dog would you want?" and squeeze in questions like the type of house, number of kids, what family activities can be done with the dog, who should walk the dog, etc. After that, do some prawning/fishing if you're into that, or head to Downtown to the arcade or Wild Wild Wet (mind you tho, it'd be MAD crowded). If not, go cycling at Pasir Ris Park - then at least you can cycle away from irritating people and boring places :D
Note: You can try the silly ferris wheel at Downtown East. You will feel so silly, you will laugh at yourselves silly, and then you will be quite merry because you find it so stupid. Laughing eyes are mad chio.
7. It's not as dodgy as you think it is.
Book yourself into a budget hotel. It's really relaxing and enjoyable. Just bring some DVDs, books, card games, anything that can be a shared activity. Buy lots and lots and lots of snacks. Packet food from outside - western food from Astons, carrot cake or beef noodle from hawker centre, desserts from a cake shop, finger food from Old Chang Kee...
In other words: CHILL, BATH, EAT, SLEEP, WATCH TV, TALK, HAVE LOTS OF SEX and it doesn't cost as much as a restaurant dinner or a typical hotel. No need to tidy up, no meddling parents, no siblings, no room mates, no noisy neighbours. Need i say more? Try Aqueens or Value Hotel. 81 and Fragrance are kind of dodgy, i admit.
8. Orientalism
Go to the infamous Yang Tze cinema and watch a porno, or watch old men wank while watching porno. Afterwards go for fortune telling session at Chinatown or Fortune Center and pick from face reading, palmistry, numerolgy, etc.
Do: Check the seats at the cinema for dirty objects, weird stains or syringes (I heard of rumors of people leaving sharp objects with aids/hiv infected blood to make others hiv positive. So creepy!) Bring a towel or something to sit on. Be careful when you reach for things, say drinks from vending machines (same thing, sharp/dangerous objects!)
9. Geocaching!
Go google if you don't know what it is. If you're a lazy bum like me, the gist of geocaching is a treasure hunt using gps. From the geocaching website in Singapore, get clues to where hidden objects are hidden all over Singapore, and record the coordinates of the location when you manage to solve the mystery of the location stated. You will need a portable GPS.
Interestingly - I've heard that there are different kinds of geo-cache (the treasure, in other words.) Paper slip stored inside some kinda storage thing and hidden. When you find it, you can write down your name, and see who else have found this before you did. Or items that you can take and keep, and in return, putting something else as a replacement. There's also geo-coins from different countries (geo-cache can be done all over the world!), you may find a geo-coin from U.S, and you can hid the coin at a new location/country with your own set of treasure hunt hints!
10. A written diarrhea of other activities/places
Zorbing, Laser Quest, Paintball, Archery, Roller-blading, Ice Skating, taking up classes together like pottery, cake making, sewing, dancing, cooking, etc. Punggol Park Bliss Cafe, Jurong Hill, Dart pubs like No Clue at Keong Saik St where you can learn how to throw darts and compete with others, drink beer and play cards. McRitchie Reservoir to feed tortoises/terrapins/ugly creatures. Snow City. Ikea. Dinner at Railway Station. Games Cafe like Settlers or Mind Cafe. Mustafa. Chinatown to soak in CNY festivities. Dennis Cafe at Prince Edwards road - very ulu, shouldn't be very crowded and it's connected to Party World KTV. Punggol End. Fly kites at the huge field next to Sengkang Sports Centre. Visit the last kampong of Singapore at Buangkok. Changi Boardwalk. Take a glimpse at the Feng Shui house (strange, amazing home of a Hong Kong Tycoon) at Sea Breeze Ave. Visit the row of temples along Old Tampines Rd. Challenge your tastebuds at Lagnaa Restaurant in Little India where you can challenge spicy dishes from Level 1 to 10. Level 5 itself is already very spicy! Toys Museum. Haunted places like Mathilda house at Punggol, Red house at Pasir Ris (not sure if it's still there), Old Changi hospital. Peranakan house at Joo Chiat. Authentic french cuisine at a restaurant along Jalan Besar. New Portuguese tarts at KFC. Old quarry mine "Xiao Guilin". Gmax Reverse Bungee AND Gmax Swing (Must take both at one go). Old Thomson Rd to see monkeys, many people feed them but be careful! It's illegal to do so!
Alright, that's it! These should be more than sufficient to ensure you don't end up eating exorbidant meals at a crowded restaurant with frazzled waiters, fighting to breath when squeezing through crowds while sneezing incessantly from pollens, getting sore eyes from seeing ugly people making out or hopelessly trying to buy movie tickets.
Have a different Valentines Day this year!
♥ Clarisse ♥
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